The Art & Power of Listening
At the end of each session, participants were asked to describe what lesson from the program had the greatest impact on them. What resonated for them the most? Here is a representative sample of comments:
- How to understand the message from the speaker’s point of view. As you’ve demonstrated, a passive approach simply won’t do the trick.
- The "tapping activity” was compelling. What people say can easily be interpreted incorrectly. Clarifying and probing questions will help me better understand what someone is telling me.
- Multitasking while listening does not work. I recognized that as I tried to do it when you covered this topic. Nice honest answer to call that out.
- My takeaway insight is to listen purposefully. Listening should be a CONSCIOUS decision: Stay focused, limit distractions that I have some control over, and verbally engage when I can.
- I found lots of value in your "100% Rule." I also thought your discussion about "internal distractions" was very insightful.
- Asking yourself "CAN I listen?" and “SHOULD I listen?” in different situations, and how to tactfully respond to others when your answer is “NO” to either question.
- Your point about how genuine engaged listening attracts others to us, leading to greater influence and understanding.
- How to stay engaged when listening to others through the verbal and nonverbal responses.
- Your "where you focus is where you are" phrase. Often we are on the go and forget the importance of being "present."
- This session makes you realize who have been good listeners in your life (at work, home, and school) and what they did as listeners that made them so impactful.
- I loved the 100% Rule and the CAPSTONE Method of Listening. They make total sense. I was definitely doing some of these things, but not consistently which I can easily improve.
- Listening is not necessarily being silent. The use of well-placed questions is powerful. As you said, these are “intelligent interruptions” that are important for quality listening.
- Engagement is as important as focus. It allows us to understand the speaker at a far greater level, and that can lead to more efficient outcomes.
- The activity that required listening to a story while you showed pictures/slides. That really underscored how we let distractions dilute our ability to listen.
- Your expression about being in the “HEAR and NOW” versus the “there and then.” I have heard people say "be here in the now," but this training gives that a whole new meaning.
- Being honest rather than engaging in make-believe listening. As you emphasized, fake listening wastes time and almost everyone sees right through it.
- Fear of looking foolish stops people from asking questions. To help my team succeed I need to create an environment where they feel safe to be more active, engaged listeners.
- I believe the CAPSTONE Method and the 4 major elements of it will definitely be useful! The practical examples were very helpful. A huge thank you for this time together!